Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Livability Indicator #9: Dog Shit

[The only thing that could make this sign better is if it showed the doggie in action...unless that is not a tail - in that case, it must eat like my mutt.]

Why? Well, ideally it means that a lot of people are living there and walking their dogs. The two cities that immediately come to mind as the most notorious for doggie doo doo are Paris and Rome. I'm sure many other large, livable cities have similar reputations.

[La Defense is so uninspiring isn't int? Perhaps the point was to contrast it with the beauty of the rest of the city. Clever Architects.]

As for Dallas? Well, I've mentioned before in the Olfactory Map of DTD about the smell of dog piss and the presence of dog shit in the little pocket doggie park at the DP&L building. This is one of the very few places in DTD dedicated to doggie defecation [if you think I'm letting this alliteration thing go, you'd be wrong].

In all of downtown, there is currently about 5,500 residents. Naturally, some will be douchebags and not pick up after their dog. I can't recall if I've ever seen anybody deliberately not pick up their doggie diarrhea, but the presence is there. That's fifty-five hundred people potentially using a 5,000 sq.ft. patch of knobby grass.

Even some like to let them go in their building of residence without cleaning up after their pikey mutt. I have even cleaned up some in my hallway just to avoid any potential blame addressed at mine. I reflexively (and probably incorrectly) like to blame spoiled SMU coeds who have never lifted a finger for their little Sparkles or Sprinkles or whatever lame name they heap upon their little Maltese, probably get their rent covered by Daddy, and in all likelihood made a mistake moving downtown, don't fit in, and CAN'T WAIT to get back to uptown where all is sweetness and light, with gumdrops falling from the trees, oh and the serial rapist there. [Has that dude ever been caught?]

I have a personal quandary, albeit a minor one. Use a permanent grocery getter bag [the obviously more sustainable choice] or collect the plastic bags? Considering that the doggie digger upper bags are never stocked, I choose to stockpile my plastic bags in a drawer that I always carry around whilst walking my pooch. Mine tends to like to hop behind bushes to be lady-like, so I often am taking her to other lesser utilized green spaces.

Fortunately, before the end of 2009, Main Street Gardens will open downtown replete with doggie run. Certainly, it will have similar issues of insconsiderate owners, but at this point, let's just be glad we have dog owners downtown because even some of the best cities in the world face this problem just because it's a product of people (not directly, from their dogs - well, in Dallas can also be from the people - which yes, I have seen) living there.

We could use the people and all the problems they bring with them.

[The street I lived on in Rome. Littered with merda, no doubt.]